Few things...

What is it the draws to your attention that pit in your stomach? I know of a few things in my life: driving on the highway and passing a patrol car parked in a strategic spot, saying something vile and realizing just moments too late that I wished I'd never said it (seek out my wife for examples), and jumping of cliffs or out of airplanes (I've done both...but it was a while ago). These are all terrible and gripping for sure, but there is one that supersedes them all: it would be the sound of vomit taking you out of a dead sleep.

Oddly, this last one is a fairly regular experience (about once every 3 weeks). However, considering the fact that many other patients deal with this A LOT more than us, we have nothing to complain about. So, "why write about it Doug?" The reason is threefold: one, for the Glory and fame of God. Two, for the encouragement of others seeking Christ as a refuge of trust. Finally, for my own catharsis.

Here is the breakdown: I am asleep at about 6am when I hear a few tears and some rustling about. I stay in a light sleep mode. Jada then cries out for me and simultaneously vomits all over. Then the tears come. Profuse tears. It is hard to watch - many times I have been there, sitting next to her holding the bag and rubbing her back. But this one is particularly difficult as she struggles to an upright position getting used to her newly casted arm. We pray. We thank God while praying that it is not too overwhelming. Then we clean things up. While she is still crying, she asks for a rag and cleans her face off. Finally, she looks up at me with those eyes... those eyes have been telling all kinds of stories for 6 years now. Sometimes the stories are full of anger, sometimes sad, sometimes determined - but at all times they are beautiful. This time, however, they are sad and determined.

She glances up and says, "Dad, I just wanna put on a new outfit." The picture you see is moments after I agreed and we worked out the details.

God has spared us of MUCH during her treatment and provided many blessings - and "many" is kind of like a baked potato without any of the fixings, it just lacks. However, God allows things like a broken arm in the middle of chemo to help us endure with patience. Colossians 1:11 says "May you be strengthened with all power, according to his glorious might, for all endurance and patience with joy..." He allows vomiting and financial pressure, relational disharmony, and all kinds of things to help us endure with patience that we might find Joy.

So, as I put Jada in the bath today and we talked - those conversations are always so lucid - she opened up. She explained to me that she cleaned her cast with soap and water. Then, fixing her eyes on it, she says, "guess that's why Jesus gave us this (and knocks on the cast)." "What do you mean sweetie?" "Well, you know dad, to trust that He knows what he's doing and to read the Bible." "Jada, I want you to know without a doubt, that God does know what He's doing - the Bible tells us so."

Romans 15:4 says - "For whatever was written in former days was written for our instruction, that through endurance and through the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have hope."

So, where ever you are right now - THERE IS HOPE! It comes at a premium though.

Feel free to post what it is that you are enduring so that I may pray for you - OR just post that you'd desire prayer.